Thursday, 29 July 2010

Crap poster artwork special - Part 2: Thailand

I love Thai posters just because they are so gaudy and loud and utterly crap. Here's a few choice posters for your visual displeasure.

Unknown film
2 words: Crochet & nightmare.

Crocodile Evil (???)
We've had a woman having sex with a cockroach and now we have one getting felt up by a crocodile...

A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors - 1987
This, frankly, scares the fucking crap out of me!

Erotic Hong Kong (????)
 If Elton John was a woman and from Hong Kong..well I'd put money on him looking like the lady in the poster.

For the Love of Benji - 1977
It has 2 cutesy dogs and a pink love heart with the words "I feel love" in it. WRONG WRONG WRONG!
Looking at this poster makes me do a little sick in my mouth, it's horrible!

Huafu The Luck Man (????)
More naked child weirdness. Why is he playing with his winky?

King Kong (????)
Proof that dinosaurs can make any film look a million times more cool(shit).

Krai Thong (2?) - 2001
Half man, half crocodile - all man raping weirdness!


Credits/disclaimer: Thanks to Cees for the disc. Sadly I am unable to locate the original owners of each poster and credit them personally. The contents of the discs were compiled from various online sources unknown to me.

Sunday, 18 July 2010

Fire starter

All God's Children - 1980
UK Release - 1983

This is either really good anti-smoking propanganda or that smug bastard with the pipe set fire to the bus. Either way this sleeve clearly tells you that smoking a pipe will clearly lead to race wars and buses catching fire. 
And they may well all be god's children, but where is your god now, when the bus is on fire!?!?!?

Thanks to Scotty for the sleeve.

(Will be continuing with the shit posters soon, just been suffering some epic computer fail this week.)

Monday, 12 July 2010

Crap poster artwork special - Part 1: Spain

Ok they're not video sleeves, but many video sleeve artwork came from posters and today I received two CD-Rs packed full of glorious and often highly dodgy posters from around the globe. So here we have part 1 in my dodgy poster special, kicking off with Spanish posters.

El rayo desintegrador - 1966 - IMDb

 I'll never be able to watch The Wizard of Oz again.
(Edit: Best comment ever re-this sleeve:
'El rayo desintegrador' - that's one happy robot and one buggered kid.)

 El Caminante - 1979 - IMDb

A complete load of arse.

Las aventuras de Enrique y Ana - 1981 - IMDb

 This is the campest thing I have ever seen in my life.

Animales racionales - 1983 - IMDb
aka: Human Animals

Tree hugging hippies!

El E.T.E. y el Oto - 1983 - IMDb

Plain weird.

Credits: Thanks to Cees for the disc. Sadly I am unable to locate the original owners of each poster and credit them personally. The contents of the discs were compiled from various online sources unknown to me.

Thursday, 8 July 2010

Ramming it down your throat

Rambox - 1988

Greek Release

Ramb-ooh: The Sex Platoons

Where do I start? The naked woman only has one tit and one of her upper arms is worryingly short. The other woman in the background is prancing around mid air in a fucking war zone! She might have both her tits but ones vastly bigger than the other.
Considering this is for a Rambo porno spoof, it's really not sexy.

Also, happy belated birthday to Sly Stallone, who turned 64 on July 6.(

This sleeve and many more wonderful sleeves can be found on Raro VHS

Wednesday, 7 July 2010

(Fore)-Heading for disaster

Tycoon - 1947

UK Release - 1983

I never knew John Wayne had down syndrome. There's only one word to describe that forehead: EPIC!

Thanks to George for the sleeve.

Monday, 5 July 2010

Sex on 6 legs

El Nido - 1988

South American (Argentina) release

The Nest

How bloody wrong and horrible is this? Look at it, it's the stuff of nightmares. I'm beyond visually offended. This sleeve makes me feel dirty, my skin is crawling!

I mean who'd wear such awful high leg knickers/panties/lady's special things..... Yuck!

(Can anyone confirm if this does indeed happen in the film? The whole sex with a great big cockroach whilst wearing bad 80s underwear?)

Thank you kindly to RaroVHS for letting me use the sleeve.

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