Sunday, 25 April 2010

Guest Submission

The following pair of sleeves were e-mailed in by Lee, with his original comments. Enjoy!

  Microwave Massacre - 1983
UK Release - 1983

"What can you say?....looks like a fat David (Pop Larkin) Jason gurning over a mongoloid artists impression of what a microwave oven looks like."

Blue Island - 1982
UK Release 
Due gocce d'acqua salata

"The illustration is ok (in a Lithuanian pavement 'chalk-art' stylee) but the title design looks like the doodles you make (with a badly chewed Bic pen) whilst someone chronically boring is talking to you over the phone."


Thanks Lee!

Thursday, 22 April 2010

The big sag...

Curtains - 1983
UK Release - 1984
When soft furnishings attack!
I'm slightly freaked out by this sleeve. Well a lot freaked out. An old woman's face that turns into a pair of curtains with a doll emerging from them, yeah, makes perfect sense!
Really don't know what to say about this one other than it's just really quite wrong on so many levels.
Saggy old lady curtains indeed!

Thanks to Chris forthe scan.

Tuesday, 20 April 2010

Beyond bad....

Beyond Evil - 1980
UK Release - 1981

Where do I even begin with this one? The eyelids that look like they're made of pieces of toblerone chocolate? The communion wafers on the cheeks? The piggy snout nose? The awfully drawn ear? The horns? The fork? It's a airbrushed nightmare. Bottom line - it's really shit!

Thanks to Rob for the scan.


Thursday, 15 April 2010

Pancake day..

The Sect - 1991
Dutch release 
La Setta, The Devil's Daughter, Demons 4

Here's another one that I'm sure makes perfect sense if you watch the film. But on it's own it's just 100% pure wtf. God bless the Dutch, a highly cultural, friendly, lovely nation of people who for some reason have done some absolutely shit video sleeves. I'm gonna hazzard a guess that the guy on the front of the sleeve was making pancakes. He went to flip the pancake and instead of landing back in the pan it landed on his face....and somehow started to attack him? Could it be the only film to deal with the subject of killer pancakes?

As ever thanks to Cees for this gem.


Wednesday, 14 April 2010

Cats and dogs...

Devil Dog: The Hound of Hell - 1978
Dutch realse

I include this, not because the art in it's self is bad, but because the artist was obviously either drunk or stupid.
You think he would have noticed the title "Devil Dog" and drawn a dog. Yes? Well no.. Instead he did a big pissed off looking cat. It looks more like Cringer/Battle Cat from the He-Man cartoons.
 You see what I mean? It's not just me is it? But it really doesn't look like a dog in the slightest.

Thanks to Cees for the scan.

Tuesday, 13 April 2010

Smug mug.

Nightmare in a Damaged Brain - 1981
  UK release - 2002
Nightmare, Schizo

Why does the child to the right look so friggin' smug? Why does he look so pleased with himself? Anyone? I'm guilty of buying this because it looked like a really naff and nasty bit of horror and having not watched it yet, I have no idea what role the kid plays in the film. But I'm sure of this much, HE LOOKS SO DAMN SMUG! The rest of the sleeve is just your standard, boring, rubbish they trot out with many of these low-budget releases of video nasties and gore flicks. It's all fairly confusing and doesn't really sell the film, altho the back of the sleeve is marginally better with all the gorey pics. But I know this much, that little brat on the front is offensively smug looking.

Saturday, 10 April 2010

Life's a drag....

Frankenstein and the Monster from Hell - 1974
Dutch release

Really should be called "Frankenstein and the Drag Queen from Hell". Since when was Liza Minnelli in this film? Either way Frankie's monster is looking a might pissed off. PMT perhaps? But it's clearly female to some extent, check out the lipstick, the massive bossom barely containted by the leather belt...It's postively erotic... Well if blokes called Dave wearing there wive's make up gets you off, otherwise it's just a really bad bit of sleeve art.

Thanks to Cees for the scan.


The horror, oh the horror!

Don't Open The Window - 1974
UK Release
Let Sleeping Corpses Lie, Non si deve profanare il sonno dei morti, The Living Dead at Manchester Morgue

Literal takes on film titles are never good and this is a perfect example why. It reeks of some pervert's fantasy of spying on his neighbour when she's getting undressed at night. Clearly chose to ignore the fact it's a zombie film and not Escort magazine reader's fantasy art section.... 
Possibly drawn by a disturbed child.

Thank you to Rob for the scan.


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